What is resilience?
We all face moments when the world seems to stop, or we stumble, or we face a block to our path. It usually makes us uncomfortable or sad or frustrated or... Resilience is at that place where we stand in discomfort and must still make a decision so that we can move on. Victor Frankl says, "Between stimulus and response, there is a space. And in that space lies our power to choose our response." My definition of resilience lies in that space where we make a decision about how we will handle the cause of our discomfort. I hope you notice that it is a place for taking action. Resilience means nothing if you can't take action - even if that action is to decide to be undisturbed by the issue, thus, freeing you up for doing other things.
How does resilience advising differ from coaching?
I really value the coaches I have had in my career. They gave me time and a structure in which I could explore my life, make some future decisions about goals, and take whatever time was needed. There is a time when this is needed.
When I advise people on resilience, it's best when done against an issue or issues that are blocking movement.
In the role of resilience advisor, I stay laser focused on the issue at hand. I offer questions for deeper understanding of the issue and the context of the issue for myself, as well as, the person seeking advice. Advice and structure for action are always offered in relation to that context.
Resilience advice is efficient, to the point, taking only the time needed -- as little or as much.
Perhaps you're looking for an Accompanier
We sometimes call this sort of person a mentor. In this book, I call them your Accompanier – it's the person who can tell you the context of an issue. They may not know exactly how to do what you are doing, but they may be able to direct you to someone who can. They also know the bigger picture of what you want to achieve. This can help you see whether your actions are working toward your goal or not.
If you want to call this person a coach, that’s fine. If you want to call them a sculptor, fine. If you call them a mentor or a sherpa or a friend or an Accompanier, that’s altogether fine!
Even if you like to work alone, you may want to find someone who will accompany you on this journey.
Borrowed from Unlocked, page 94.